Still Have Nightmares

A Memory of Fornethy Residential School.

I will never forget Fornethy residential till the day I die. I remember it was in the 80s. I’m sure I was in primary 6 or 7 and my friends and I begged our parents to go what I thought would be an amazing adventure. I remember my mum packing all my lovely new clothes and sent me on my way. I was quite a well developed child and very timid and shy. it turned out that none of my friends went so I was reluctant to go. to this day I wish the horrid memories would fade. Pretty much from the first day the experience was a nightmare. I was one of the oldest there and my life was made a misery. It was very regimented with older teachers a good few who were incredibly cruel. I remember being responsible for walking the dog in the long long walks frozen cold with the dog and me full of muck, I was told to make sure the dog was kept clean so when back at the school the mud would be all over the floor which I would need to scrub till spotless then have to wash the dog whilst everyone else would be drinking their milk with digestive biscuit. This happened almost every day. I remember being told to stand in line as it was time to have our shower. I was very modest and didn’t want to stand naked so I wore my swimming costume. Of course this drew attention from the teacher. My costume was removed from me and I was made to double up in a cubicle with another girl and made to wash each other whilst the teacher watched. Once up at river Esk because I was disobedient in wearing the costume I was made to stay in the dorm while the girls went downstairs to watch Grease 2. the teacher made sure she left me with a few stories about the school being haunted. I remember there were shutters on the windows that banged constantly with the rain that evening and I remained terrified. they sure had it in for me. I remember one night the girl in the bed beside me was crying for her mum. I tried to console her and reassure her that I’d look after her but next thing I knew I had this massive torch light glare right into my eyes and was hit on the head and marched outside the dorm. I was made to stand outside the teachers bedroom all night. dinner time was a nightmare and were force fed our meals. I’m sure I recall a tuck shop but I was told my mum never gave me any money which I knew wasn’t true. I remember we were to attend church and my mum had bought me a really pretty glittery dress to wear but a teacher made sure that I’d be dressed in a kilt which was too big for me and kept falling down and I was a laughing stock. We were all made to dance round a statue I’m sure was of Peter Pan. I remember going into a classroom one day with a letter written on the blackboard that we were to write to our parents. I didn’t do this and wrote a letter begging my daddy to come and collect me and explaining all the things that were happening to me. I never thought for a minute the teacher would read them first and I was made to rip it into pieces and write the one from the blackboard. I remember on our way home which felt like forever and as we pulled into Buchanan bus station parents were coming to the bus to collect their children and I couldn’t see my mum and dad. I’ll never forget that teachers words on the bus that day saying to me oh what a shame there not here for you we will have to take you back to fornethy, I remember being physically sick until I saw my dads head appear in the crowd and I ran off that bus and into his arms. I’m sitting crying here writing this and I hope karma prevailed on the horrible women that made what was meant to be a memorable holiday a total nightmare that haunts me still. Even looking at the pictures of the place frightens me.